Stacey the aspiring stewardess

On Saturday night, I was coming back from dropping my friends at the bar, wanting to head to bed early after a long day… and then I ran into Stacey in the landing of my apartment building.

I was all dressed out from going out, and after I offered her a neighborly hello, she responded, “You look delicious.”  I then stopped walking, deciding this is was conversation that needed to be continued.

We continued our awkward bantering, as I tried to unwind whether I was delicious or if she was referring to her Hot Pocket she was nibbling on. We also covered other topics, such as the fact that she watches me from her balcony when I come home from work, and my current relationship status:
Stacey, “So do you have a girlfriend?”
AJ, “No…”
Stacey, “Oh.  … So, do you have a boyfriend?”
AJ, “No.”

Just like in the movies, it was pretty easy to quickly move from initial flirting to getting her in my apartment.  Unlike the movies, I proceeded to stall for the next 2 hours, both keen to see what would happen and horrified to what could happen.  In that time frame, I learned the following things about Stacey:

1.       She’s currently a nurse, but is an aspiring stewardess, and just got hired by Jet Blue and will be heading to Cape Canaveral for training soon.

2.       She’s earning a degree in business, but only because her Dad wants her to.

3.       She doesn’t like people from Pennsylvania, or at least the fact that there are too many of them here in Wilmington.

4.       She’s 30, which I found out after I incorrectly (and honestly) guessed 22 ….

5.       She’s the Maid-of-honor at for a wedding August 3^rd.  I know this because she asked me to be her date. I politely declined, explaining that I will be in Milwaukee at the time.

6.       Stacey made blueberry jam for the wedding as table-toppers.  We sampled some, it was quite good.

7.       Stacey is not very good at banagrams, but she’s certainly a trooper while losing badly.  

After nearly 2 hours I got tired and sent her back to her apartment, and I went to bed.

The following lessons were learned:

1.       That girl/guy down the hall that you always check out but never talk to… they are probably doing the same.  The key is to wait until one of you admits it, preferably the other person.  

2.       If you are patient enough, you can, in fact, wait until a girl comes out of nowhere and completely throws herself at you. No need to actually go somewhere, or try in any capacity.  

3.       As a corollary to #2, chicks dig guys that are well dressed.  So when walking down dark alleyways, dress nicely, and eventually you will meet a nice girl.